I breastfed my oldest son for ten months. I only stopped because I was young and he started biting and I just quit because I didn’t want him to bite me. Stupid, I know. Fourteen years later I had my second child and I have been determined to breastfeed LA for a year, a full year. I have told my husband if he starts biting and I can’t get him to stop I will pump at least til the one year mark. I have been very determined all along.
Today I am having a moment (these moments are coming all too often lately). I really want to breastfeed for a full year but let me tell you, it has been a struggle since he was about 4 months old, he is now 8 months old. I had been getting JUST enough when I pump at work. Let me clarify, when I would pump in the morning at home and three times at work, I would get JUST enough for him the next day while I was at work. When I say JUST enough, I am talking right down to the very ounce of what he needed is what I had been pumping. And then….my period returned at six months. My supply hasn’t been the same since. Early on I had 120 ounces in the freezer. We’ve gone through all of that but 20 ounces and I can’t even tell you the last time I was able to put some in the freezer. I used to pump 5 ounces in the morning, now I get three. I used to pump 4-5 ounces total from both sides on each break at work. Now I get three. I have tried adding a pumping session before bed and I don’t even get 1/2 of an ounce.
What else have I tried? I have tried eating oatmeal every morning, I drink the mother’s milk tea, I tried Motherlove more milk plus, I have tried pumping longer at each session. I just don’t know what else to do and at this rate it doesn’t feel like I will be able to make it four more months. I am very saddened by this, I never had this problem with my oldest son and I don’t know what to do. We want to have another baby soon and it worries me that I won’t be able to nurse the next time.
Again, I am having a moment today. I am feeling horrible about it and I just needed to vent. If you have any suggestions, I’d love to hear them. 🙁